On Thursday, Boyfriend and I went to my old stomping grounds, Astoria, to meet up at a gigantic outdoor bar with people he knew from a former internship. Because of Tornado warnings, the bar was completely dead but we powered through anyway.
While Boyfriend schmoozed with his former boss, I talked with a few of his former internship mates. One was a tiny, tiny, known hardcore Conservative Christian Texan which is why I was surprised when she was talking about how wasted she got at the law school prom the week before. I agreed that I was also incredibly drunk and we laughed together, just like all of my imaginations show. Then she started talking about how the next day, she woke up with her knees completely tore up and a scratch on her chin. "I have no recollection of how it happened! Nobody even remembers me falling!" she said, over and over again. I knew this was my chance to help her think outside of the box.
"Now, I don't want to offend you," I prefaced, "but is it possible that you were giving blow jobs that night?"
This time we did not all laugh together.