I am so sorry to all five of my loyal readers. For the entire month of September, I have neglected you. For this, I apologize.
It's not that I don't have anything to say. Or even that I have too much to say. I just can't figure out how to say it. But I will have a new and good post coming up soon. It's about my first days at my new job! Yes. I am gainfully employed again. It sucks. It's not that my job sucks but that I hate working.
Boyfriend claims I need to work because otherwise I just wallow around in my own filth, depressed. This is true but it's not because I'm not working. It's because I have no money. Second to myself, I love money more than anything. Money is the source of all fun and happiness, no matter what anyone tells you. You want to go abroad? Not without money! Skydiving? Ask your good friend, Money, about that! Feel like an impromptu trip to Atlantic City or want to go see Jay-Z and Eminem in Yankee Stadium (for a ridiculously kick ass night) on a whim? Better wrangle up some money!
Of course, people are always like Wahhh, you can't snuggle with money! Money can't console you when you're sad! Money won't make you laugh! But clearly they don't know that money can buy whores, liquor and comediens. And, if you want love - look no further than a mail order bride or husband. Or some common slut, male or female.
So, I promise I will put the work post up soon. I tried to do here at the ING Direct Cafe that I'm sitting at but they have my blog blocked (probably a good idea). Soon, my five friends, soon.