Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I Need an Intervention

I'm addicted to LOL.

LOL went out of fashion around 1995 and I've wanted to stop using lol for a long time now. I'm never laughing when I enter it, despite its meaning. Yet I still can't stop. Sentences with no humor at all are punctuated by a thoughtless lol. I seem to have totally lost control of its use, using it at the end of sentences, questions, exclamations and commands! I use it to express sarcasm, whimsy, even irony. It litters my Facebook, Twitter, text messages and I even want to SAY it sometimes. I'm spiraling into a dark hole of LOLs.

Today, I texted someone and asked, "when are you getting here? lol"

There is nothing funny about that sentence. It certainly didn't make me laugh out loud by any means. The 'lol' just makes me look like a giant tard who isn't satisfied with punctuation or real words. What I was trying to indicate with my lame usage of lol was: Hey, don't think I'm impatient or needy, I'm just trying to find a way to see what is taking soooo fucking long without sounding like an uber bitch!

So I guess if I want to get off lol, I'll have to start really expressing my feelings which should whittle my friend list down nicely because my actual feelings are really malicious and bitchy and text does nothing to soften them, lol. For real though, I'm going to try to go one month without LOL because it's the most serious of my addictions right now; I can tackle drinking, laziness, overeating and board games any old day.

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